As a young child, I never dreamed of being a religious Sister. As a matter of fact, I had never really been around religious Sisters. However, my maternal grandmother would often whisper to me, “Some day you will grow up and become a lovely nun.” Her words were cute yet never found much of a home in my heart. Rather, I found myself immersed in a very active life occupied by friends, sports, music and social events. I assumed that I would get married and have a family of my own, or even become a missionary serving in foreign lands. Yet it is never good to assume…
When I was a junior in high school, I joined members of my parish youth group for a trip to St. Louis, Missouri to see Pope John Paul II. At the time, I was more interested in missing a few days of school than seeing the Pope. However, God had a different plan. When the Pope entered the Kiel Center, the cheers were loud and deafening but my soul grew silent and still. JPII spoke the following words with conviction, “To those of you who think that Christ may be inviting you to follow him in the priesthood or the consecrated life I make this personal appeal: I ask you to open your hearts generously to him; do not delay your response. The Lord will help you to know his will; he will help you to follow your vocation courageously.” At that moment, I felt the Lord tugging at my heart and I could not resist.
My life continued to be filled with normal activities. However, my prayer life was deepening and I would slip into chapel during lunch for some time with the Lord. As a senior in high school, I met the Apostles of the Sacred Heart of Jesus at a youth event. Though I noticed the Sisters’ joy and was curious about their lifestyle, it was the life and writings of Mother Clelia Merloni, our foundress, that spoke to my heart. Mother Clelia’s deep faith, her profound love for the Sacred Heart of Jesus, her struggle for virtue, and her life of sacrificial love resonated with me, and I believed God was personally inviting me to be His Apostle.
One day, after serving a detention, I shocked my parents by sharing my desire to become a religious sister. They thought that this was my best excuse ever and that I was teasing. I heeded their request to go to college, and, after two years as a student at Benedictine College, I could wait no longer. In the year 2002, I joined the Apostles as a postulant.
Five years later, I would go to our Generalate in Rome for part of my initial formation, and would have the opportunity to visit Blessed Clelia’s tomb and the meaningful places from her life. I would also find myself at the foot of JPII’s tomb where the only words I could muster up were, “You ruined my life! Thank you.”
I am deeply grateful for my vocation as an Apostle of the Sacred Heart of Jesus. To be a spouse of Jesus, a lover of His Heart, and to share His Love with others has been a pure gift.
